An Interesting Moment of Reflection

A girl I was friends with in high school recently sent around some questions she had about peoples' experiences with high school youth ministry. I rarely pay attention to such things, but something prompted me to read and respond to it. It was an interesting chance for me to reflect on my years growing up in the church, so I thought I'd post it here.

I don't mean these answers to be overly critical; I was blessed in many ways by the local body in which I grew up. However, I do realize that there were some major issues I was left with and have since only begun to work through.

Here's the questionnaire:

Were you involved in a youth group in jr high/high school?
Yes.

For how long?
All the way through.

Was it your own church's youth group, or another youth group?
My church's

Why did you choose to participate in the youth group that you were in?
Because it's what you did in jr. high/high school if you loved Jesus and went to church.

What did you think was the purpose for your youth group (think beyond what they said to what actually happened)?
It seems to me on reflection that the essential purpose of youth group was to socialize young people into a Christian culture. My later answers will probably explain that.

What did your youth group do well?
It had a good grasp of a need for both inward and outward growth. It challenged some of the world's presuppositions that kids were exposed to.

What did your youth group do poorly?
It seems to me, both in my own growth over the last few years and interacting with my peers coming out of you ministry, that there was a basic foundational flaw in youth ministry as I experienced it. I guess I could break down its issues into three categories:

1. It lacked a foundation solidly planted in the gospel. Like much of my experience in evangelical Christianity over the years, the gospel served as a sort of "entrance mechanism" into Christianity, after which it's purpose was essentially exhausted. What came then, under the guise of Christian growth, was essentially moralism--making kids feel bad about their sin and then encourage them to make God happy by changing. This stands in stark contrast to true Christian spirituality, which encourages a pursuit of holiness out of an understanding that God is already fully pleased with us.

2. When challenging young people toward holiness and dealing with sin, it tended to take a very surface-level approach. The vast majority of time was spent on external exhortations: don't have sex, don't drink, don't masturbate, evangelize your friends, etc. However, the root sins underlying these issues were never addressed. The fear, pride, and depravity of my heart were not dealt with well; only their symptoms. Because of this, it seems to me that the pattern produced in myself and most of my peers was to trade one sin for another: I was trained to be a moralistic, self-reliant man who primarily pursued holiness out of fear of disapproval from his brothers and sisters.

3. It was essentially pragmatic, rather than spirit-reliant. The question asked was "what works" when it came to things like growth, prayer, and outreach. Because of this, both in evangelism and discipleship I feel that a huge number of unbiblical, manipulative tools were used to try to force faith and growth upon hearts which had neither.
What would be your suggestions for improvement?Jesus Christ is the absolute center of everything we talk about. Make your sole concern with giving people a compelling view of his beauty and supremacy, his sovereign grace and absolute holiness. There will be more benefit for a young person if they get a single glimpse of the glory of God than they can find in all the emotionally-coerced, flesh-dependent methodologies men can come up with.

After graduation, have you still been involved in church and to what extent?
Yes, I am a member of Grace Chapel in Lincoln.

What do you think [has] helped you to stay involved in church?
The unfailing faithfulness of my gracious Father.

Did your youth group involve you with the rest of the church/adults? (forming adult relationships/mentorships)
Not really, although I was blessed outside of youth group with independent relationships with several godly adults in my church growing up.

Any other input that would be helpful:
Read "The Discipline of Grace" by Jerry Bridges, "A Long Obedience in the Same Direction" by Eugene Peterson, and "Grow in Grace" by Sinclair Fergusen. If you're feeling really ambitious, I would also commend to you "The Mortification of Sin" by John Owen, "Grace Abounding" by John Bunyan, and "The Doctrine of Repentance" by Thomas Watson.