Spiritual Depression

This is a blog that has been several-weeks in the making, although now may or may not be the best time to write it since I'm feeling wonderful now as I'll be leaving later today for the annual L'Abri conference in Rochester, MN. (For those of you unfamiliar with L'Abri, I'll write about it sometime, but that's a whole separate series of posts that will have to wait)

Until these last few days I've found myself struggling tremendously with a constant feeling of discontent which resulted in unhappiness. This is something others far wiser than I have already written volume upon volume about so first I'll commend you to the work of John Piper and C.S. Lewis on this subject. It should also be noted that much of what I say will simply be a fusing of what these two men have written on the subject. It should also be noted that I will not here attempt to discuss God's sovereignty and the problem of pain, that is also another subject for another blog. This blog intends only to discuss what one may do practically to address one's own spiritual depression.

First, I'll share a bit about myself to hopefully frame what I'm going to say. I tend to be an extremely emotionally-led person. Even when I have rational reasoning to do something, what I really end up doing is largely determined by my emotions. This is part of the reason why, for example, I struggle greatly with forgiving those who I feel wronged by, it's not so much that rationally I don't see the need for it as it is I simply can't deal with the personal sting I felt from the person. This also makes me highly susceptible to bouts with spiritual depression. If you haven't listened to John Piper's message about the life of William Cowper I highly recommend doing so. Even if you do not have such a temperament, it may help you understand those of us who do slightly better. And if you do have such a temperament it will be a refreshing reminder that others share your struggles.

That being said, there are several things I suggest doing to help in dealing with spiritual depression:
1) Please, adopt a realistic attitude toward your present state in life as well as your state of mind. In reminding yourself of where you are in life, you'll be reminded that you have many tremendous blessings that many people don't have. In the words of Rob Bell, "8% of the world's population owns a car. When you're driving your car-no matter what kind of car it is- most of the world's population looks at you and says, 'Rich.'" I don't say this thinking it dispels the clouds, but to draw attention toward the manifold ways God has blessed you as well as the great needs others have so that it may motivate you to serve the oppressed and under-privileged, I'll explain why that is especially important during times of depression later in this post.

But also adopt a realistic attitude about your state-of-mind. Often, when I'm struggling with depression I have this nagging thought in the back of my mind, "If only _____, then I would be happy" and it's the most destructive thought one can have. There generally is not a magic bullet for a melancholic personality. Ultimately, I believe depression stems from a deep discontent with the way things are, something within us says, "This isn't how it should be." We can work to make things better, and we ought to, but ultimately our hearts longing is for unity with God and that will never be fully satiated in this life. In the second place, if you develop the attitude that there is, then when you acquire said bullet and still struggle with depression, you will be disappointed and perhaps plunged into deeper depression. I think religious people often use Jesus this way. We make it sound as if Jesus fixes everything-and in one sense he does. But he doesn't fix it all at once, immediately following conversion. Donald Miller has an excellent talk on this topic that you can find through Imago Dei's podcast or at their website (the title is Our Father in Heaven, given on June 26th, 2005). Finally, do not forget that, as Bart Moseman wisely put it, "Whatever you have, you have because God is good and whatever you don't have, you don't have because God is good."

Second, do not let depression drive you away from community. This is something I often struggle with. When you're feeling discouraged, the last thing you often want to do is spend lots of time with people. Now, there is some wisdom in giving yourself a little down-time to recharge, however, if you abandon all your friendships, your church, your community groups, etc. then you're setting yourself up for long times of discouragement.

The reason for that ties in with my third point, which comes almost entirely from Piper's talk on Cowper but since he thought of it while giving the talk it is not in the transcript at DG (which is why you should listen to it. Another reason to listen to it is Piper had a much deeper voice in 1992 when that talk was given and at first it's slightly odd listening to him if you're used to the way he sounds now). Human beings have always been self-absorbed but there seems to be a special sickness our generation struggles with in this regard. Everything is about how it relates to us, and often our depression simply stems from the fact that our eyes are only on ourselves. A time of melancholy is a great time to remind yourself of the glorious gospel of Grace, that salvation is of God's sovereign grace, and that he is fathering you to maturity (that was a synthesis of things said by Piper, Tim Keller, and Don Miller). It is also a good time to surround yourself with others so that you can spend periods of time completely lost in their lives, their being, and in doing so, temporarily forget about your own despair. Then, once their gone, you're left with something besides your own discontentment to think about. This is why it is so vital that you be helping the under-privileged during times of depression, it fights your depression on two fronts by reminding you of how you are blessed and giving you time to lose yourself in the life of another person. It is also why you must not abandon your friendships and community groups during those times, because if you do, it's only more time for you to think about how depressed you are. (And sometimes I think all my depression really is is me thinking about how depressed I am)

If anyone wishes to add their thoughts, by all means, please do. This is by no means thorough and, as was said above, I would commend everyone to John Piper's voluminous works on this topic (When I Don't Desire God, The Hidden Smile of God, and When the Darkness Does Not Lift).